Technology Tuesday: The 8 Most Badass Villains in Gaming

DiggThisYou would think that being a badass is a given when talking about a true villain. After all, most every villain is bent on some form of world domination and massive genocide, so they clearly have the not giving a crap part down, and at that point you can probably skate by on a few cutting disses and an above average sneer. Sadly, far too many villains prove that being a bad ass villain isn’t as easy as one would reckon (we’re looking at you, Dr. Wily) and so it’s important we take time to sit down and appreciate the select few who show what being a true badass is all about.

#8. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy 7)

There. Sephiroth is a must have on any Top Anything Villains list that doesn’t want to end with 6,000 comments on how Sephiroth should have been on the list, because oh my God, Sephiroth is so awesome. So here he is, right off the bat. Everyone can breath easy and put away their replica man-sized swords.

He really is quite dreamy.

*Sigh*

Now, I’ve never actually played Final Fantasy VII, but if you’re here reading this, you probably have, so I’m betting the odds are not too good that this field gets filled in to any reader’s preference no matter how well researched it is. So, an executive decision has been made to just kind of wing it.

As you can see, he’s got some pretty long and girly hair, as any good Final Fantasy villain would, which means he probably has to be really badass to have ever ascended to being any kind of genuine threat to anybody. As adored as he is, fan art only seems to make this problem worse.

She is kind of cute, actually.

In the end, Sephiroth’s badass abilities aren’t enough to counteract the comically-oversized nature of protagonist Cloud’s sword, and he is smote verily (I’d have to imagine.) Continue reading

MMA Monday: The 6 Worst People You’ll Find Watching the UFC at a Bar

DiggThisTimes are tough right now. Money is tight, the economy is in the shitter, and yet the price of Ugg boots cruelly continues to rise, forcing today’s man to be more frugal with their discretionary spending. When it comes to the weekend’s fights, this often means ordering them with a group of friends to split the cost among many. Not everybody has friends however, or at least not friends that aren’t tightwads, which often leaves visiting the local bar that’s getting the UFC come fight night as the only option. While it is cheaper than paying $45-$55 bucks (at least, for those who can control themselves at a bar, that is) it is not an avenue without peril, as any visit to watch MMA among the masses opens the door for any of these enjoyable characters, who can quickly make you wish you could actually hear Goldberg’s play-by-play.

The Conscientious Objector
Who They Are:
People who are above the kind of low-brow, degrading entertainment that this bloodbath of a “sport” provides.

In all of five minutes of debate, O'Reilly managed to make Dana White look like a calm, level-headed man.

And don't get them started on teleprompters.

What They’re Saying: “I just prefer sports where the object isn’t to kill your opponent, personally.”
Why They’re the Worst: The Conscientious Objector isn’t out at the bar to do something as disgusting as drinking their liver to oblivion while watching two guys try to choke each other unconscious. Instead, he’s really just looking to focus on the first half, and yell at you for showing the initiative to be comprehensive in your vices. The Conscientious Objector is often a boxing fan, who is keen on telling your how much the sport of MMA pales in comparison to the sweet science, which is in turn a beautiful thing to behold, as opposed to, you know, two guys just bashing each other in the face like this ultimate cage fighting business. Continue reading